Pork Butt, Bom chicka wow wow

Pork Butt, Bom chicka wow wow

food slideshow - be careful, some pics maybe xxx rated!

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Sunday, April 5, 2009

nola, part 4a

Wow, I am so slow.

So this is really the biggie. I was pretty hungover Sunday morning. Well, my head ached, I was tired and shaky and hungry. Maybe it was just because I was up late.

So anyhoo, we were going to go to Royal China. It was going to be a big group, but we were too tired and lazy to call anyone, and I figured someone would call if they wanted to go. So CMG - Cuban Musical Genius - called or maybe we called him. So he asked how fast we could be ready. Real fast. Well, not that fast. But we were waiting for him. He had brought along a crew - LCRM and RSLM to share the experience of Royal China. RSLM had never been there.

So we got there around 12:30 maybe. There was a wait. We sat there in the little atrium on the bench, waiting. It was cold. Luckily they had a sliding glass door that we closed. So every time someone walked in the front door, they had to open the sliding glass door and then close it. But I felt like shit because....because I had stayed out too late, not for any other reason.

So finally we got a table. The big table that usually for a party of 10 like Harry Lee's family, or where the staff eats and does side work. Well, we needed to spread out for this anyway.

So basically, they handed me the sushi list style menu. It's got all the dim sum listed, and you check it off with a pencil. The guys looked at the pictures of things while I tirelessly checked off boxes. It's a lot less stressful than waiting for the carts and wondering what they will have and making quick decisions whether or not to get something or wait for something better. It's like trading stocks on Wall Street because I am very familiar with all that (insert sarcastic look).

Here's the thing about eating dim sum. I'm sure a lot of you know this, but I'll say it for those of you who need educating. You gotta order at least two dishes per person for regular eaters. For people with big appetites, maybe four per person. When the FP and I used to go alone, we would order between 7 - 9 things.

So this time, we ordered two of everything, except for the vegetable.

Shrimp Dumpling.
So this is one of those items that I always feel like we need to get when we are with other people. I mean, when you think dim sum, you think dumplings, right? But sometimes when the FP and I go alone to a place that has the carts, we don't save room for the dumplings.

But I'm always happy to eat them. Happy dumplings! They are just comforting. Little slighty sticky doughy pillows with yummy filling. I could go for some dumplings right now.

Beef Short Ribs.

So these are like one of CMG's favorites. I gotta say, they are a crap shoot. Sometimes they are perfect, sometimes they are so chewy that it's just not worth the effort for that little piece of meat! The BBQ flavor is really good, but can't they just cook it long enough every time? No offense. I shouldn't criticize Royal China. I love Royal China. I worship Royal China! But yeah, the flavor was great. And they were pretty tender actually. They were delicious.

Chi Chow Har Kow.

These are one of my favorite little lesboerotic foods. They are little shrimp dumplings that are shaped like tortellini - and the shrimp filling has cilantro too. It sounds so simple, but it just comfort food again. I could go for a plate of these right now too.

Tofu with Shrimp

This was not what we expected. When we used to get what was titled "stuffed bean curd" or something like that, it was bean curd sheets filled with shrimp. This was just tofu wedges with shrimp jammed in between it. It was okay. Compared to everything else, it was the least exciting thing. Just kind of blandish.

Paper Shrimp.
Love the paper shrimp. It's basically a cross between a shu mai or a chi chow har kow and an egg roll. Got it? It's the same shrimp and cilantro filling, but it's fried! Yum. I could go for a couple of those right now!

Spinach with garlic.

You want to make sure you're eating a well balanced meal all the time. Eat your veggies for fiber and nutrients. Big slices, some whole cloves of garlic for heart health and longevity. The greens are always good. Who doesn't love sauteed greens, right? Everyone who doesn't like them is crazy.

Squid with Black Bean Sauce.
Now, this is the shiznit - to use a pretty dated expression - the word expression is a pretty dated expression as well, kinda like something my mom would say.
Squid with Black Bean Sauce. They take these tender little baby squid and they just cook them perfectly. They are tender. Not chewy, not like chewing on an eraser. Tender. Toothsome. And the sauce. Jalapenos. Not like bite your head off hot. Gentle warming heat. Flavorful heat. Black bean sauce makes everything delicious. Especially tender toothsome squid. God, I could go for a plate of squid with black bean sauce right now!

Curry Squid.
Yep. More squid. But you have to get both. One cannot choose a favorite. It's just like a light curry sauce. You know, similar flavor to the curry powder, but really good. And it's that tender toothsome baby squid again. So delicious. So just a lovely dish that I can't imagine getting sick of. I can't ever think I would ever say, nah, I don't want the curry squid this time. CMG mixes the two squids together. I could really go for some curry squid right now.

Steamed Rice in Lotus Leaf.
This is like the king of dim sum. It always comes first or last, which is not a good order. But you deal with it. If it comes first, then one may get full too fast. If it comes last, one may be getting full and have to rest before tackling this bad boy. So yeah. It's sticky rice. It's chicken and sausage. It's steamed in a lotus leaf. It's like the best Christmas or birthday present ever when you unwrap it. All that flavor has steamed together in a yummy dish. Some have eggs and all kinds of stuff in them, to the point where the rice is secondary. But the rice is really the good part. It absorbs all those flavors, so you want a lot of rice. You want other stuff too, but it's gotta be a restrained proportion of the packet. You know, it's like when there is just too much... smoke in a shrimp....or too much banana runts in the pack....or too much cheese on a pizza and not enough sauce. Anyway, the rice in lotus leaf is my favorite. I could really go for some of that right now.

So we pretty much killed a majority of the food. There might have been 5 ounces of total leftover food left on all those plates. We did take our time. When we all kinda stopped eating, we had a little break, and then we dug into the remnants. I felt very...triumphant after that meal.

So the FP and I were pretty spent. We had to go back to the hotel room and take a nap. Thus ended our time with CMG for that trip.

Royal China
600 Veterans Memorial Blvd.
Metairie, LA 70005
Phone: (504) 831-9633
Fax: (504) 837-9554

Oh yeah - as far as chopsticks - this place gets \/\/\/\/\/ - ten chopsticks - and yeah, the rating is one to eight.

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