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Wednesday, August 10, 2011

5 Guys and an Overly Sweet Peach

So, this totally sucks, because I was almost done and was about to publish this, when I erased the whole blog entry.

So here we go again.

5 Guys burger - pretty good
5 Guys cajun fries - too salty and too many
5 Guys grilled cheese - really good
Bruster's ice cream - too sweet


Okay, fine. I'll write more.

So, I was in Lakeland, Florida. My hometown. Yup. So, with all the culinary offerings that Lakeland, Florida has to offer, we thought we would go to Five Guys for lunch one day. My oldest sis, Openheart, and I have never been to a Five Guys. So, we cruised on over.

My middle sis, Buffalo Rib, had been to Five Guys before. She ordered a little burger. In disbelief I asked, that's it? I on the other hand am always ravenous when I go to Lakeland. I think the nerves and stress and anxiety cause me to have a huge appetite. So, because I didn't know when the next meal would be, I decided to get a double cheeseburger, regular patties. I wanted fries and Openheart said she'd have some too. So when I was ordering, I think Buffalo Rib was trying to tell me to get the medium fries because they would be plenty. The guy taking my order told me to get the large of course. And, I was listening to my greedy gut, so I got the large.

So, the food came out, and it was a lot. My massive double cheeseburger was like 140% bigger than an Inn N Out double cheeseburger. And the patties were handformed and kind of falling apart, and they were making my bread soggy. Okay, I have no problem with hand made patties, I prefer them of course, but I don't want them breaking up and juicing up my buns! Anyway, the flavor of the burger itself was good.

The fries, were too much. I wish I would have heard/listened to my sis. Especially because she paid for lunch, and she wasn't even eating the fries. So, there was a large cup of fries, and there were also a ton in the paper bag as well. They were cajun fries. There was too much spice on them, making them extra salty. But, of course, being the Food Ho that I am, I kept shovelling them into my piehole.

So, my sisses were done with their burgers. My nephew was still eating, as once he's clamped onto a breast he doesn't let go until a couple birthdays have gone by. I'm joking. He's only 3 months old. He does love his milk though and sucks it down every chance he can get. I was forcing myself to finish as much of my burger as I could so I wouldn't be hungry before dinner, whenever that was going to be, when I remembered that I had been wanting to try the Five Guys grilled cheese. When I mentioned it to my sisses, they decided to order one to share.

So, the deal with the grilled cheese, is they turn the bun inside out and slap mayo on the outside to cook with instead of butter. Sound gross? That's what I thought, but my friend who used to work at Five Guys in San Diego had told me it was delicious. Since, I would never grace the Five Guys of San Diego with my presence, I was glad I got to try it. And it was delicious. So why will I never go to Five Guys here? Said friend who told me about the grilled cheese got the axe basically because he and his boss didn't get along. So, his boss found some lame excuse to fire him.

Later on, we were hot. If you've never had the fortune to visit good old Lakeland, Florida, then let me tell you - it's hot and it's humid. So, we wanted ice cream. We went to this place in the Highlands called Bruster's real ice cream. Sounds good, right, "real" ice cream? Homemade, good quality ingredients, time tested family recipe or something? They had some whimsical flavors, as ice cream shops should, like Jamaican Me Crazy and Purple Dinosaur.

So, Openheart asked what those flavors were. Jamaican Me Crazy was coconut ice cream with almonds and fudge. I don't usually associate almonds and chocolate with Jamaica, but I guess we're to assume that the chocolate and almonds in this ice cream are from there? Anyway, the Purple Dinosaur was just vanilla ice cream with purple dye. So, Openheart got the Jamaican Me Crazy. Which is funny and fitting when you think about it, because she has dreads.

Buffalo Rib got the Turtle ice cream, which is always a classic, but in the heat of the sun, wouldn't be my choice. Chocolate makes me even thirstier when it's hot. Since the turtle ice cream was the meltiest, she got the smallest portion, which was probably good on account that she had to eat it fast.

I already drink an average of 90 oz of water a day, so I got peach. It sounded so refreshing. Mine didn't have any chunks in it, just bits of peach in it, so I got an enormous portion. I thought it was going to break the coveted sugar cone. I guess when I'm in Lakeland I always get large portions of food. I think the stress and anxiety make me voracious, as large quantities of food have always been a comfort. I guess the theme that day was "biting off more than I could chew." It was sweet. Too sweet. Sickly sweet. Oh, but I ate it. It was cold and refreshing. After over half of it, I was over it, though. I just wanted to sugar cone, and I didn't want to get through the last of the ice cream to get to it. Luckily, Openheart said she would eat it. She sucked it clean off my cone, and hurrah! my cone was accessible!

So, it turns out the Bruster's is a chain. So, lucky you, those of you who like supersweet ice cream, you can find a store near you!
Bruster's real ice cream


Ryan Hogrefe said...

I had Five guys for lunch today. I too learned my lesson the first time I went. Never order the large fries unless you have a family to share with. I also ate at Brewsters here in GA a few weeks ago.

the food ho said...

So, did you like the ice cream?

Ryan said...

I got a Turtle Sundae and it was great. I can't pass up Turtle anything so I was quite happy.

the food ho said...

I love Turtles (the candy and the animal)!