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Thursday, July 31, 2008

Ha Ha Ha Ha

So last night, we went for "a couple drinks" with friends. Of course it ended up being more than that, because my boss was one of the participants, and he kept buying us drinks that we didn't want anymore.

So we had to go to Albertson's for dinner. We didn't really want to cook, so we got.... you'll never guess. Bertolli frozen "complete skillet meal for two" - two of them of course, because we each eat at least the amount that is 2 servings.

So I wish I would have remembered to take a picture of it. You might remember these frozen meals from the previous Top Chef season with Rocco Dispirito. Rocco, Rocco. I guess being made to look like a total penis on The Restaurant wasn't enough for you. You had to promote Bertolli frozen meal in a bag as well. Do you know if he uses Italian EVOO in those frozen meals? Okay, this is getting out of hand. I can't get rid of this Rachel Ray virus. Does anyone have a superthorough antivirus program I can use to get rid of her. She's really invading my internets space.

So everything is IQF - individully quick frozen - so it is all separate stuff that cooks fast and evenly. The sauce is rectangular chunks.

So here's the Shrimp Scampi:

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Here's what it says on the package:
"This enticing dish is truly a garlic lover's dream. Imported Italian linguine pasta cooks up al dente and twirls around your fork just like restaurant pasta. Succulent shrimp, roasted red peppers, yellow bell peppers, and slivers of garlic are topped with a creamy garlic sauce.

Suggested wine pairing - chardonnay "

So it had pasta, cooked shrimp, onions, the other stuff.

This stuff reminds me of when I was in high school and I would get the frozen vegetables and pasta in a bag with some sauce and you add meat to it. Although I wonder if I would like that stuff better than this stuff if I ate it today. I really don't know.

So we didn't follow the directions. Of course, the FP had to add water to it. It was too much. I remember that Top Chef episode, they couldn't add water to the pan, it had to have enough moisture as is. Well, the scampi was very watery. I guess the flavor was okay. The shrimp were fine - not rubbery or iodiney, or raw.

The other one was chicken parmagiana & penne. I liked this one better because it tasted like, you know, tomato sauce. The chicken was weird though. It was like frozen breaded chicken that is reheated in frozen marinara sauce. The FP hated the chicken, I think. I can see why. I was really kind of drunk, so I ate it.

Here's the funny thing. The shrimp was 560 calories a serving and the chicken was 440 calories. I felt like the chicken dish had more substance and that weird breading, so I would think it had more calories. Anyway, I ingested about 1000 calories for dinner, but it was not as satisfying as I would have thought 1000 calories would be.

Anyhoo, yeah. That's what we ate. I'm not proud of it, but I yam what I yam - the food ho - when times are tough, a food ho will get whatever is put on her plate.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Yoshinoya

So, some of you know, that I have this band - I'm not the band leader, but I came up with the name, so if we ever split up, I'm keeping the name - called perfect blue, not the perfect blue, not a perfect blue, not prefect blue, not joey's perfect blue, and not guest. For some reason, people get our name screwed up. Anyway, I we practiced last Monday, and then the FP and I needed to get dinner. We thought we were on Convoy Street, so we should get something there. We had seen Yoshinoya before, but we had never been there. It was clearly open, so we figured it was a good chance to go there and cross it off the Convoy street list. I pictured udon and ramen and other cheap japanese noodle dishes. http://www.yoshinoyausa.com/menu.html There's the menu. No noodles. Rice dishes. So the FP got the beef bowl and I got the combo. On the way home, it was stinking up the car. It smelled like cafeteria beef. It was such a distinct smell that reminded me of elementary school, that I kind of liked the smell. I think others would find it repulsive.

So we got home, and opened our boxes. I forgot to take a picture first, so here's what it looked like after we messed them around.

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So we both got the beef, and I got the addition of the chicken. That sauce smell was so overwhelming. It was like, the sauce packets for gravy that they have in the grocery store. Don't ask me who "they" is, it's just a nawlins saying that I used to make fun of, but I now use. Anyway, that's what it tasted like, prefab sauce and MSG. The chicken was a little more, um, bbq flavor maybe, but generally the same. The weirdest thing though was the beef. It was that thin sliced, maybe chuck. It was you know, like the thin thin meat like for sukiyaki, shabu shabu or whatever. The only problem, was that it was poor quality meat. Just no flavor, just bizarre. Andrew Zimmern should do a bizarre fast foods episode and go to Yoshinoya.

The veggies. That was something else. They were steamed carrot, broccoli, kind of like that bag of veggies you get out of the freezer section. They were gummable. Very soft. And the rice, it was hammered. Water logged, overcooked by at least 10 minutes. Just terrible.

But we were starving. We both ate most of our food. The FP said that when he took the last bite, he almost barfed, so then he stopped eating. That would have made for a better story, but he didn't. In a bizarre way, I liked the cheap fake taste of the food. It was so, bad for you tasting. It's like, how could anyone eat that food and go back for more. I mean, it was kind of late, maybe they were about to close and let the rice and veggies overcook. But the beef.... it was just weird. Like I wrote before. Weird. Bizarre.

Yoshinoya. If I had a Convoy list, I would cross out Yoshinoya with a big red x so I would remember never to return. As if I would forget. I give them \/ two chopsticks. Why 2? Why not 1? Well, \. one chopstick because we almost ate all of it, and /, the second chopstick because we kept it down.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

birrias chivos & cheves

So last Sunday after eating at El Salvadoreno, we went back to Imperial Avenue for dinner. We went to that little stand called Birrias. It has mostly patio seating, and it's next to a mariscos hut looking place. So the menu says Se Habla English, se didn't habla mucho english, so we ordered as best we could. The menu is in spanish. So the FP got the huarache azteca. We weren't sure what it was exactly, but it read birria o pollo, so the FP said, goat? The guy said, beef. The FP said, do you have goat, yeah. The guy said, yeah, goat. So then we got the the birria de chivo, a half order, which comes with tortillas and consomme!!

So the huarache azteca is a tortilla with lettuce, thick slices of roasted nopales, cheese, beans and beef. So it was beef. This is not the type of thing we would normally order if we knew what it was, but it was really delicious. It was a nice little surprise. I'm glad we didn't know what it was. I think those nopales were the real star. They were so tender and yummy. I really love nopales, but I haven't figured out how to cook them. Sometimes it comes out good, sometimes it tastes like shit. I don't know if it's the cactus or the way I'm cooking it.

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So what is birria? There are different translations of course, but what we got was goat meat stewed or steamed or somehow cooked in a chile broth. Then the consome is like the drippings with some beans in it.

I can't even explain to you what it tastes like. If you've never had goat, you might be scared and think it's earthy and gamey. Well, it can be, but this was just rich, meaty, chiley, goodness. Because it was steamed or slowly stewed or whatever, it was so tender, and pretty mild for goat, but really fantastic. Ha! I don't usually use that word, fantastic. Well, since it was spanish, it was Fantastico! It's like if meat heaven were a dish... it would be birria de chivo!

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This is unfamiliar comfort food at it's finest. You know what I mean? Sometimes I eat something I've never had, but it gives me that warm fuzzy feeling, like when my mom used to cook in the middle of the night. I would wake up to find pot roast or something, and if it was done I would have some. That's what comfort is.

The consomme was delicious as well. I can't tell you how the essence of goat and chilis in a broth is just one of the most fabulous things known to mankind.

We also got a side of beans. They were whole pintos, not mashed, which is always a plus!

Anyway, if you're ever on Imperial Avenue, looking for Birria, there are a lot of places there. I only know this one, and I highly recommend it! Birrias Chivos & Cheves 2709 Imperial Ave, SD,CA 92102

Saturday, July 26, 2008

El Salvadoreno Breakfast

So, yeah, we went there again, on a Sunday morning. They had just opened when we got there. This seems to happen a lot.

So they were setting up, it took a while - but of course we were very hungry. We had not eaten dinner the night before. That is very rare. Not normal behavior at all for us. We had walked to the bar that night, and the only food on the way home from there is Jack in the Box. Which, I'm not a fast food snob, but, I am kind of a bit put off by Jack in the Box. It's just okay. But a couple people have gotten sick after eating there. Anyway, we just passed out Saturday night.

So Sunday morning, we were sitting, waiting. We ordered a pupusa, so we would have something to eat while waiting for our other dishes. The sauces came out first. The hot sauce was pretty hot, very smooth and smoky. The other thing was frothy. The FP stirred it, and there were bubbles. It didn't taste spoiled, so we just let it sit to see if bubbles would reappear. They didn't really reappear. This stuff isn't really good anyway. It's the one thing we don't really like at El Salvadoreno. It's just like chicken broth and canned tomato.

We panicked a little, because the waiter didn't bring the slaw with the hot sauce like he usually did. But we figured if the pupusa came out without slaw we would ask. I think they hadn't finished making it at that time, so I decided not to panick. Not yet. The pupusa took a while though. It was hot when we got it. A little too hot and a little greasy. We should have let it sit for a minute, but we were too goshdarned hungry. We pretty much devoured it. It was tasty, as usual.

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I took the picture after the FP quartered it and put slaw on it.

Then the main event. I got pork chops and fried yucca. The yucca was very nicely done. Big thick slabs of it, crispy on the outside, starchy fluff on the inside. Um um good. The pork chop. It was very strange. It was highly seasoned, but it tasted like it was seasoned with one of those McCormicks seasoning mixes. Very black peppery. It took me by surprise, that first bite. Then I assessed the flavor. It was delicious. Just not what I expected. Very nicely cooked thin pork chops. I was happy.

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The Food Pimp got the carne guisado. Beef stew. The beans were really pureed that morning, much like the first time he got them. The stew was hearty, rich, meaty. very comfort food tasting. The interesting thing about it, is that those chunks of beef always look really dried out, but they are so tender. Like plastic spoon tender. But not falling apart. So...toothsome. The carrots were undercooked like always, I guess because we get there so early.

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I know it doesn't look like much, but you have to taste it to appreciate it. It's all in the flavor. You know, like all brains, no looks. Yum. Brains sound good right about now. Oh, it's 8:55. No wonder I feel like eating. Maybe I'll just do a morning number 2 instead.

Friday, July 25, 2008

WTF?

Who googles "beef vagina porn"? That is just....well, beastiality. It's illegal you sick son of a bitch.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

1 year!

This is exciting! I wrote my first blog entry one year today.

Happy Blogoversary to the Food Ho, Happy Blogoversary to the Food Ho,
Happy Blogoversary the Food Ho, Happy Blogoversary to you, and to the Food Pimp,
even though he doesn't blog.....


Sorry, had to sing to myself. Anyway. What a year, what a year. It's funny because at first I was determined to journalize every meal besides what I took home from work. I gotta say, that's really difficult. Sometimes I can't even remember the specifics of interesting meals.

So what should I write for my blog on my first blogoversary? How I've grown? I actually haven't gained weight, which might be surprising if you read about what the majority of my diet consists of - lots of food. I could write about how I've changed. Well, I have. When I eat, I do consider whether it will be fodder for a blog. I've started writing meals down in my calendar as reminders. That's kind of weird, but it really helps. I could write about the best and worst of the year....

Okay, just on scanning the posts I'll do my worsts first because I'm a negative person by nature - that way I am pleasantly surprised more often than most people.

Worsts:

Worst Meal Eaten Out - (maybe eaten in for that matter) Soup Plantation. ! God, a lot of people love love love this place! I don't know. The whole experience altogether was just unpleasant. The real highlight was seeing the thrown up soup in the bathroom on the toilet. Ugh. It makes me cringe just reliving that.

Worst Thing Cooked In the House - I would have to say that Thanksgiving turkey. I checked the thermometer, and it read like 162 or something. And I swear it wasn't near a bone. But I don't remember what was going on. All I know is, it wasn't cooked. Blood everywhere. The Attention Ho and Mr. HRFM walking in with Mr. HRFM's dad and introducing us. Blood everywhere. It was like a scene from Texas Chainsaw Massacre. That was just a weird night altogether.

Worst Stalking - This one place down on 30th street that just opened last year. I wrote a not wonderful review of them. "Anonymous" defended them. Anonymous seemed to be connected to the restaurant in some way, mayhaps?

Anyway, from that day forward, there were a lot of vists to my site from 2 or 3 different users. They got there because they were googling that restaurant. Every day, sometimes more than once a day. So I ended up writing "apology".

On looking back, maybe I shouldn't have. I should stand for what I write, no? But I did write it, and I'm not going to delete it. It is part of who I am.

Anyway, we went back one or two times. The first time, it was obvious they knew it was us. The one guy didn't say hi, and he did before. The woman was very interested in talking to us. She even stared at us while we ate! So I wrote a blog entry without the name of the place - titled miscellaneous meals.

I hate to say, that because they recognize us and almost might as well say, hey Food Ho! we probably don't go there as much as we would. I'm not really trying to hide my identity. I mean if you take the time to read a few blogs, you can figure it out if you care to. The thing is, I'm not well known, and it's uncomfortable that someone would really care about my opinion that much. I'm used to people not asking for my opinion, not caring about my opinion, doing the opposite of what I think should be done. So I guess I'm taken aback when someone cares so much about my (negative) opinion. I guess I should get used to it, because one day I'll be making money off if when I become the world famous critic - the Food Ho Extraordinaire....



Bests:

Best Fine Dining in San Diego - Hands down, The Grant Grill. http://thefoodho.blogspot.com/2007/12/long-time-no-blog.html This is fairly easy because we didn't eat too much fine dining this past year. We ate Thanksgiving dinner there, and that was an interesting night. It's almost always interesting eating a meal with the Food Pimp's family though. I should charge a fee for a tourist attraction.. "Come eat a meal with the family von Food Pimps. $50 plus the price of your meal. Sign up, because seats next to the Food Pimp's dad are filling up fast!"

Best Food Eaten at Home - I don't know. How could I choose? Of course, all that food my mom cooked while she was here was great. ... It was really nice having them around. Although we are too dirty for them, and they have their ways...

Best Birthday - Okay, this is dumb because I've only had one birthday this year... I just wanted you to read or reread this post! Dumpling Inn and Long John Silver's are two establishments very close to my heart. And I'm not even kidding about LJS!

Best Food Excursion - New Year's Day in TJ! http://thefoodho.blogspot.com/2008/01/foodborne-adventure.html You just have to read the blog entry....

Best google search that brought someone to The Pork Porn Pages aka The Corned Beef Hash Gluttons' Blog (I don't know how many of you noticed I switched the name around hoping I'd get more porn prowlers)... - "Is Corned Beef Hash Made Out of Cow Vagina?" C'mon. You don't know the answer to that? Of course it is. That's what gives it the lovely texture and flavor. Did you know that depending on what time of the month it is, the corned beef hash tastes different, due to the cow's menstrual cycle? Some cultures don't call it corned beef hash, they call it "corned cow vagina hash". I mean, why mince words.... Maybe I should change the blog name to "the corned cow vagina hash gluttons' blog" Whadya'll think bout that?

Best Ethnic Food - Do you really expect an answer? If you've read a quarter of these blog entries, you know that I am very indecisive. In fact, I couldn't decide if I should use indecisive or wishy-washy in that last sentence. And now I kind of regret my decision. I should have used wishy-washy. Should I go back and change it? Nah. Or, maybe...

So, do you want to know why I'm so indecisive? I didn't major in psychology (but that was the first class in which the Food Pimp laid eyes on the Food Ho and fell in love, but due to catching mononucleosus from some slut he didn't really care about, the Food Pimp had to drop that class and every other class and go home to recover for a few months because that's how bad it was when he should have been snogging on the Food Ho instead of just a common everyday ho)

Anyway, I'm indecisive because of my dad. I know, everyone blames their parents. I got in trouble once, because he heated himself up a frozen Lender's bagel in the microwave. I was maybe 7. He asked me if I wanted one. I said no. But then the one he ate looked good. So a little while later, I made myself one. He got mad. He spanked me. I swear.

Then, another time, we were ate like Ross or Marshall's. Shoe shopping. I was in third grade. I wanted these green adidas. My dad asked me if I was sure I wanted them. For half an hour. I said yes, for half an hour. We got them. Then I didn't know if I wanted them later. They kinda clashed with my cordorouy pants. I remember racing Beau Composky during PE with those shoes. He always won. That's why he liked to race me.

So I'll just write a list of some of my favorite places. If I forget one, don't think I don't like it. I just forgot about it, maybe.

Super Cocina
the Dumpling Inn
El Salvadoreno
Phuong Trang
Long John Silver's
Tita's Kitchenette
Aji Seco
Soju Town
Young Dong
Costa Brava
The Fish House
The Grant Grill
El Borrego
The other Borrego Place off Fairmount - the name escapes me,
but it says Borrego and Barbacoa
Jasmine
Hooters
Inn N Out
Lucky's Golden Phenix
Old Mill Cafe
Island Spice
New York Pizza
Oaxacan Restaurant
Popeye's
Tijuana
New Orleans


Thanks for letting me share with you the intimate, minute and compulsive details of my first year of food blogging

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Fancy Night Out

So, Friday evening, the FP decided we were going for "just some appetizers and wine" at Farmhouse Cafe. Our friend Mr. Hot Redneck from MI works there and we haven't been there yet. The truth be told, we are very poor at managing our money. And I really am not into the more upscale dining like I used to be. It's just, you can spend all this money to be sorely disappointed. You know, I guess it's like, say you had a choice between a bj and genital intercourse from a fairly attractive prostitute in that seedy prostitute way for a reasonable price, or you could get your dick touched by some pretty girl, to the point where you get a boner, but she doesn't finish you off. The price for the second scenario is 3 times as much, because she's an "escort" and is not required to do anything she doesn't want to. And you've already taken her out for dinner and drinks like a "date" on top of that. Which one would you choose?

Anyway, I'm not sure what we were discussing in this episode of the pork porn pages. Oh yeah, the Farmhouse Cafe. It's On Adams Avenue right by Park Blvd. It's tiny and it's owned by this french chef and his wife. The logo has a duck in it, and there are like wooden duck figures lining the back of the banquette. You know, like all a little different, different poses, colors, and they look like they were imported from France. But there was no duck on the menu! What a tonguetease!!! No tender duck breast, no sexy leg confit, no foie.... Man talk about needing a cold shower, or a cold glass of water.

Basically, they are going with the farmhouse style. The FP's mom and sis would probably love it because they like farmhouse stuff. You know, wood, wicker, cute baskets and things. The place is nicely enough decorated - except the bar. It's a nice big bar with about 15 seats, but it's made of that stuff. I want to say melamine, but I'm sure I'm wrong. It's the stuff that kitchen counters were made of in the 50s, 60s or 70s. You know? The stuff that's just a sheet, so each side of the countertop comes together at right angles with a black seam. It was yellow I think. Anyway, it sucked. Farmhouse - I think wood. I just wonder what they were thinking. Anyway, I'm not an interior designer - I have a freaky, ugly, kind of Punky Brewster/Blossom kind of style - none at all.

This is about food anyway. So we sat at the lovely bar, on the side near the the window. There was a mirror on the wall reflecting into the kitchen, so from time to time we saw our buddy. He didn't know we were there. We were hoping to eat before he saw us. We got some wine. I can't remember now. I'm not a wine afficionado. I can't even remember the grape at this point. Anyway, it was really boring. That's okay though. I don't know anything about wine, so I could give a shit.

So we got some bread and butter. The bread is from Bread & Cie, which I have never been to, even though it's supposed to be amazing. The bread was cold in the middle, which was strange. It was good, just cold. I figured there was a bread holder on the wall, and maybe an air vent was blowing on it or something. Weird.

So the first course, we ordered the chicken liver mousse and the heirloom tomatoes with fresh mozzarella.

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So the mousse was really good. It was not very livery, which for me is a good thing. I love foie gras of course, but other livers, I'm not a big fan of. But one can make chicken liver pate tasty. Anyway, it was nice. It was garnished with some nice chunky sea salt. The pickled veggies were really good - cauliflower, cornichon, carrot, green pepper, I think.

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The heirloom tomatoes were okay. Not great. There were red and yellow. The yellow ones were much better than the red. That's not so much the restaurant's doing. I mean, I think they didn't grow them. And you can taste stuff, but not necessarily every tomato. And they are expensive, so you can't throw them out. But with the balsamic vinegar and extra virgin olive oil, you mean evoo, hehehehehe. I'm really sorry. You know how some people get viruses and worms on their computers? Apparently I have this recurring Rachel Ray virus thing going on. Hopefully it's not contagious. Anyway, the tomatoes were okay. The little baby cherry or grape ones were better.

The FP pointed out how his mentor, chef at Rio Mar in New Orleans, taught him to cut heirloom tomatoes in chunks. That way they retain that meaty juicy quality that we love them for. Coincidentally, the chef at Rio Mar is also meaty and juicy.

The first mozzarella slice I tasted was kind of soft, like it wasn't kneaded enough, or it was sitting above the waterline. It was kind of mushy, and not so good. I'm not saying it was horrible, just kind of a bit of a distraction from the rest of the dish. But the other one I had was fine. While I'm criticizing, I'll also say that we had hoped for some sea salt on that dish as well.

So by that time, the place had a bunch of people in there. For some reason they were all on the front side of the restaurant. Actually, the reason was the windows. All surrounding us. The FP felt like the building was going to tip over. Interestingly enough, it was all mostly older patrons. We decided we were the most attractive ones in the place, and we aren't conceited. Okay, the FP is. But I kind of have self loathing issues and whatnot.

Anyway, our friend spotted us and came out to say hi. So I don't know if that changed the outcome of what we got next at all. I'm going to say no. Because it wasn't busy yet, and we didn't get anything crazy. We got the mussels and the escargot rissotto.

While we were waiting, the chef came over and said hi. He introduced himself. Turned right the the Food Pimp and said, so you're a personal chef? So he asked about all that, and the FP gave the spiel. Then he asked if we were from Michigan. We said no, New Orleans. So the chef asked, how do you know Mr. Hot Redneck from Michigan, then? I told him that I had worked with Mr. Hot Redneck from Michigan at the last job that he worked at. This was news to him. Mr. HRFM never bothered to tell him that I had previously been Mr. HRFM's boss. This only supports my theory that Mr. HRFM does not respect me culinarily speaking as any kind of authority. I believe, him being a younger cocky cook, that he thinks he's better than me. But that's how they are -those younguns. Me, I'll tell you what I know, and I won't bullshit it - unless maybe I'm interviewing for a job. I even made a blunder during cooking classes admitting that I had never done the recipes... But anyway...

The chef then asked what we played in the band, and he made a comment about how we were needing all this time to go on tour or something. He was trying to make a joke out of something that is not amusing to him. I think he gets pissed off when we play shows because Mr. Hot Redneck leaves work early about once or twice a month on a Friday, Thursday, or Saturday.

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So the mussels were nicely cooked. But there was no broth in the bowl. They put a big thick slice of bread down there, and it absorbs all the liquid. So you cut off a piece of it and get all the flavor. My first bite was very...gremolataey. Well, really garlicky. It was good though. The mussels were mild. The shaved fennel seemed weird, but I think it worked.

The rissotto was al dente. Okay, some grains were just not cooked. Not all though. It had such a good strong, fresh, parsley escargot flavor though. And then there was a lot of cheese. I used to love oodles of cheese on my... everything, but now, not so much. Partially because I moved here, and I'm used to different things, and partially because I started facing the fact that I'm kind of lactose intolerant - being Filipina and all. So to spell it out for you, some types of dairy gives me bloating and stinky gas. There. I wrote it. Now those of you who didn't know know now.

Oh man, I really enjoyed this meal more than it sounds. When we got to the bottom of the rissotto, all the rice was perfectly cooked and it wasn't as cheesy. It was perfect down there. If only the first part had been that good. But we've all sent out not perfect rissotto. I'm sure I have more than anyone. I'll admit it.

Anyway, we looked at the dessert menu, and there was no creme brulee on it! That's what the FP wanted. It's like his favorite dessert - maybe next to tres leches, I'm not sure about that. So that was our meal. We left all the wbite heads to take over. They could fight over who was the most attractive after we left.

So I'm not sure how to rate this place. I mean, I'm more of a tango than waltz kind of girl - not that I know how to do either dance. But you know what I mean. You know, the whole tasteless prostitute metaphor.... I realize that my readers (not my pass by looking for weird porn visitors who never return) are very intelligent people. So I don't have to overexplain things like I do. But I tend to do that in all aspects of my life. But getting back to the readers. That is very flattering, ya'll! I cain't bulieve all ya'll smarty panties takin tam out o' yo bizy skedules to lookit this cher lil ol bloggy blog o me. No, seriously, you people should be reading blogs about Stephen Hawking type shit instead of mine. Here's a link: http://motls.blogspot.com/ Go ahead and copy and paste that when you're all finished up here.

So should I rate this place? I think that sometimes, Mr. Hot Redneck's friend - who works in the kitchen with him - might pop in and read this blog. So I'll pose the question to you, Laotian Flower - should I rate Farmhouse Cafe, or should I wait until I've had more offerings there, say, entrees, brunch, etc? What do you think?

Anyway, after this, we went and met our friends at the Whistlestop. I had vodka tonics and started this "carwash dance" thing. We were sitting in the smoking alley, so when people passed through, they had to squeeze between us. So I thought that we should dance while they squeezed through, and I would say, "dancing carwash". If I were wittier, I would have said "dancing personwash" or something more fitting. Anyway, everyone half assed did it for the first few people, and then I was the only one....So maybe on that note, I shouldn't rate the Farmhouse Cafe just yet.....

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Bangkok Thai Spices Restaurant

So, Saturday both yours truly and the FP had to work. So when we got home, we were starving. We needed food fast, so we went to maybe the worst place for that - Bangkok Thai on El Cajon Blvd in the old pizza hut looking building.

Why do I say that? Because it was around 3 pm, and for some reason, the place was pretty busy for that time. And there was only one server. It took us forever to get water, which is usual everywhere else, but this place. They usually give us a carafe of water right away. Not this time. We were dying of thirst of course. Then we finally got the water and ordered. The FP was getting edgy, but alas, after minutes and minutes of staring at the other diners and trying to find out what number we were in the lineup, our beef salad came. I think it's called waterfall. Anyway, it was hot! It was both hot temperaturewise and spicy scale wise. We asked for it to be a 6 - at my request. It was a 9 or 10. Even the FP thought it was hot. No matter what level we ask for this dish, it's always hot hot hot. But it's really good. Steak, cucumber, cilantro, red onion, tomatoes, vinegar, soy, and there's something else I can't remember.... oh yeah, chiles...lots of them!

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So then I got some noodles, and damnit, I can't remember the name on the menu. Anyway, it's one of the ones with the pepper next to it - indicating that it's spicy. I ordered that at the heat level of a 6 as well, so I was prepared to have my head blown off. And of course we had ran out of water by that time with no chance for more. So my noodles came, and they were a 3 at best! I think they used all the heat for the beef salad and didn't leave any for my noodles. Anyway, we had the condiment tray. I don't even know if I used it because I still had residual heat from the beef and no water. My noodles dish was similar to a pad thai, but with wheat noodles. It was kinda room temperature. I'm not sure if it was supposed to be, but I figured it was since pad thai is never hot temperaturewise either. I ordered pork, and the pork was purely incidental, but the noodles were good. There was a "brown sauce" which was , you know, thai tasting. Vinegar, sweet, spicy, and it had peanuts, carrots, green onions and bean sprouts. I gobbled up the whole thing.

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The FP had red curry with combination proteins. He always gets the combination. It was delicious. Really. It always looks like it's just not going to be great with those bell pepper strips, but then it ends up being great. It was sweet and nutty. I mean, nutty coconutty creamy goodness. And there is so much sauce to put over the rice. I could probably just eat the rice and sauce and be satisfied. He devoured his as well.

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As we were leaving, it seemed that the second shift had gotten there too little too late. Oh well, when the food is good and the prices are decent, people tend to have more patience. I don't know if I've rated this place before, but what the hell... I give this meal at Bangkok Spices Thai Restaurant at 2832 El Cajon Blvd. a \/\/\/\ 7 out of 8 choppers.

Vo's Cafe

So, last Thursday, the night after the sorry "adobo", I decided to take a miss on the cooking, so I ordered takeout from Vo's Cafe. Luckily, I had the takeout menu, so I ordered ahead. It was around six o'clock. He told me it would take about 10 minutes, so I went to get water at the store, then I picked up my food. When I got there, there were two guys on either side of the place, waiting for orders. Then when I walked up to the window (it's a stand on University Avenue near Aiberto's), the phone rang. Someone wanted to call in an order. This time, he said it would take 15 minutes. I guess they were busy, which is good. I want this place to thrive since it's so close and it's not bad.

So this time I got an order of eggrolls and the BBQ chicken and beef combo that comes with a spring roll.

So I ate the eggrolls for my dinner. Yeah, it's kind of juvenile, but part of being a grown up is eating what I want to when I feel like it. Actually, I deal with a lot of denial - if it weren't for that - I would weigh 200 pounds more than I do.

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So the eggrolls were hot, crispy, and good. They were filled with noodles, carrots and barely discernable pork. But the pork isn't important if everything else tastes good, after all its fried food. The nuoc mam just needed a little more vinegar and some siracha, then it was good to go.

Then of course, I had to taste the combo while it was hot. The fried rice was light and had some egg. It didn't have that fried rice food coloring, which was nice. The BBQ chicken and beef were delicious. Sweet, rich, a bit spicy, just really good flavor.

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When the FP came home, he took the spring roll, dipped it in the too sweet sauce and set it aside. So I ate it. It was cold and a little soggy. I should have let it come to room temperature a bit, but I didn't. I ate it with fish sauce and siracha, and it was okay. The pork in it was a little dry, but the mint was nice and fragrant.

The funny thing about spring rolls here, is that they seem to be bigger than on the east coast. Now this one wasn't as big as the ones at Saigon, but it was still tubby. I don't know if the Vietnamese here are compensating for something or what...
I mean, I guess it's half as much labor to give two jumbo rolls rather than four skinny ones. But this just means there's just a lot of noodle in them - so proportionally, there isn't as much other stuff. I mean, the wrapper is made out of rice, the noodles are made from rice, it's like a triple starch! Anyway, that's just my thoughts on spring rolls....

But you people should try Vo's Cafe if you live in north park. It's pretty cheap and pretty good for the price.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

I should be ashamed to call myself a Pilipina

So Wednesday night, the FP had a cooking class. One of the recipes was fried chicken. So he bought a bunch of chicken legs and there was a pack for us for dinner. I didn't have much money, and I was busy working on this new song that I just can't finish. So I have to admit, I wasn't into cooking. I took the big soup pot and literally put the chicken legs in, and then I added the ingredients that I use for adobo, more or less. Then I turned the heat on and let it cook. Not very good. I didn't taste it at all, or put the love and care that I usually put into it. So, it was edible, but too acidic and just not very good. I'll admit it. Some of you probably think I'm full of shit sometimes, because most of what we cook at home is "delicious" and "scrumptious" and all that. Well here is an example of a meal that was not all that or a bag of chips. Not even those crappy golden flake brand chips that are like greasy scabs. And on top of that, my guitar track didn't come out right - it was out of time. But most of the vocal track was okay.

Don't Make This Sorry Excuse For Adobo Recipe
i repeat - don't make it!

8 chicken legs
6 bay leaves
a pinch of peppercorns
a few coriander seeds
10 oz soy sauce
4 oz fish sauce
8 oz rice vinegar
3 oz honey
1/2 onion diced
3 cloves garlic

So it didn't have enough sweetness, and then I put it in a pot that was too big so the liquid didn't cover the chicken. Also, the way that I usually make it - others do it differently - is I sear the chicken, take it out, put in the onion, garlic and peppercorns and coriander and bay leaves, let that stuff cook. Then I add the sauce ingredients and then put the chicken back in. In a pot that is small enough to make it all cozy so that the chicken is submerged in the liquid. So don't do what I did here. It's no good.


On another note. We went to Conching's Cafe last weekend for breakfast. It was either 9 or 10 am. We usually go to Tita's Kitchenette, but we thought we'd try something different, since we hadn't been there in a while. From what I remembered, Conching's always had a few seafood dishes, so that would be disappointing. Unfortunately, they had none on this day. Anyway, we both had no trouble deciding. I got the pork adobo and the roast pork with the vinegar and onion and bell pepper. I wish I knew what it was called. Can anyone tell me? I'm so unfilipina... The FP got the adobo and this beef and onions dish. So we went to pay, and we realized that they only took cash. Then we realized that the FP "forgot" his wallet. He does that a lot. So I had to go to the bakery next door to get cash out. When I walked in, the bell rang. So this lady came out from the back, and saw that I just needed cash. She asked me if I wanted a pan de sal sample. I said, sure, of course. So she handed me a roll in a paper bag! What a score. It was nice and warm. So soft and yeasty, and a little sweet. My parents are always looking for pan de sal when the come visit. They usually get the grocery store kind, which is not the same. Now I know where to go when they come back to visit.

So the roast pork with onion, peppers, green onions. It's like ceviche. At Tita's they serve it room temperature. At Conching's it was hot. Not as good. The pork wasn't crispy, it was stronger and vinegaryer. It wasn't bad, just not as wonderful as the Tita's version. It was just good.

The adobo. That was nice and greasy, and fatty, and there were large pieces of pork fat that just came away with the plastic foork that were tender and flavorful. I know that might sound gross to a lot of people - but you know the old Emeril adage, right? The sauce could have been a little more acidic, but that's what that garlic vinegar is for that they have in the squeeze bottles on the condiment table. So I used the pan de sal to soak up all the greasy and vinegary sauces.

The FP's steak and onions turned out the be steak and goat and onions. We were thinking that they put the two leftovers together maybe thinking they were the same. At any rate, it was quite a pleasant surprise. The rich soy saucey beef and goat tasted great together. Anyway, not a drop dead gorgeous meal, but pretty good, and a different experience for you to read about. Aren't we courteous to think of all you dear FH and FP fans when we eat?

Thursday, July 17, 2008

One week to Blogoversary!

Why am I so excited? Because I just found the blogoversary button 2 weeks ago, and now I know when it is!!!

If you go back to the earlier entries, they probably are not as interesting or funny. To tell you the truth, I'm a writer at heart, but before I started doing this blog, I had not been putting pen to paper or should I write fingers to keyboard for anything other than emails, web searches. I hadn't written much creative, besides song lyrics, and I don't know if you would call them creative if you read them anyway.

Anyway, Ringo has gone kaput. So if you look at some older blog entries and don't see a photo, that's because it was from ringo. I am trying to repost these pictures, but I'm kind of not looking forward to this. It's kind of tedious, and not nearly as fun as writing new blog entries!

del Del Taco

That means of the Del Taco....

So Sunday night, we played that show at the Backstage at the Bitter End (my band, perfect blue, played the show - we're apocalyptic atmospheric indi puss rock on crack). And actually, we kicked ass. I mean - I think it went really well. And I am a diehard pessimist. So being downtown, we stopped by Del Taco on the way home for a midnight dinner.

Now, growing up on the eastern seaboard (well, the FP grew up in Western PA, but he likes to call it east coast) we had Taco Bell. When we moved here, we saw Del Taco, but didn't know anything about it. Then people told me it was good. And it was on the way home from my first, very short job here. So at 2 am when I'm hungry and driving home from the bar, what do I do, I stop at Del Taco for the first time. I have to say, it blew Taco Bell away. I know, a lot of you are thinking - are you kidding? What about the local real mexican restaurants? Well I think all kinds of places have their... well, place. I'm not saying that I would go to Del Taco for lunch with my family or anything. But for fast food, I stand by Del Taco. I know that now, if Thomas Keller or Tom Colicchio are reading this blog entry, neither of them are going to hire me like they were thinking of before they started to read it. Oh well...sigh.

Anyway, I like Del Taco. There. I said it. I don't care what you think about me. Okay. I do care. But this is a one way conversation, so I don't know what you think about me unless you send me a comment anyway. I LIKE DEL TACO. And no, I don't consider myself a real "chef" anyway. If some of the people I have known call themselves chefs, I don't want to be in the same club as those guys anyway....

So yeah. We got two #11s or some high number like that. A beef burrito, a crunchy taco, crinkle fries and a drink - macho sized.

So the drinks were lemonade. That's the only noncarbonated drink I think they have. And it tastes like lemon pledge. But I was thirsty on the way home, so I drank it. But it's weird, because I haven't eaten Del Taco in a long time, and there was something so reassuring about the fact that the lemonade tasted exactly like it did last time I went there. And the time before that. And the time before that.

I love crinkle cut fries. It's definitely a comfort food thing. When they are crunchy on the outside and soft like mashed potatoes on the inside. They smelled good on the way home. But I didn't eat any. Amazingly. I should have. They were kind of not as hot as I thought and limp when we dug into them. There were too many. I don't know if I've ever said that before. But there were two cups of fries. Like drink cups. 32 or 24 oz cups full of fries! Okay, we ate a lot of them, but not all of them. The Food Pimp broke out the mustard and malt vinegar, of course. Ooh, very multicultural, this late night meal!

On to the burritos. They are just ground beef burritos with cheese. Nothing special. But they just taste good. It's like the same spices that fake mexican joints have, but more of it. More garlic, chili pepper, grease, you know, the flavorful part. Anyway, we got del Scorcho sauce to squirt onto our burritos and tacos. mmm mmm good. I scarfed that shit down. And then that crunchy taco. You know, like, american (as in United States - because Mexico is America too, but we United States citizens seem to forget that fact because the whole world does revolve around us) style. Lettuce, cheese, ground beef. Same seasoned ground beef, but in a crunchy shell with the addition of lettuce. It was really tasty too, though. Can you imagine if fine dining places did pre fix menus the way fast food places did:

Potato soup

Exotic Beef Empananda

Spicy Beef Vol a Vent

Lemon Martini


Okay, I'm not going to sit here for ten minutes coming up with a more fine dining menu, but you get the point. It's not a well balanced meal. Oh, but you say it's fast food. Oh, well, excuse me. If I want to eat an unbalanced meal, why does it have to be fast food? Tell me that. I don't think it's fair.

Anyway, if you live in San Diego and you've never been to Del Taco, you should go. It's a cultural experience. Like going to Inn N Out Burger, but on a lower level.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

It's just not right

Okay, so I know in so naming my blog, I invite certain types of internet surfers into my weblog. But why am I ranked so high for these random searches?

"rissoto porn"
I'm number 1

"american - filipino porn"
I'm number 5, and ooh gross, who wants to see that anyway? There are some sick bitches out there, I tell ya...........

Dinner - Food Pimp Style

So, last night, we were working on this new song in the practice space. Our practice space happens to be off of Convoy Street, which is quite convenient some great food. But, we are low on cash right now, so we didn't go out to any of the find eating establishments in the area. Instead, we went to the Albertson's right there on Balboa.

I didn't feel like cooking, so it was up to the FP. He wanted to make basically the same thing he made two weeks ago before 4th of July, curried okra and ground lamb. But since we were at Alberton's, we settled for ground beef. If you knew how many times we think we've gotten "sick" (as in, the way the FP gets after eating cabbage and other green leafy veggies) off of ground beef products from Albertson's, you would think we were nuts for still going back and buying it from there.

Well, if you haven't been reading this blog for very long, I'll give you a hint...
WE ARE NUTS!

I mean, come on.....

Anyway, I guess there was a ground beef recall just last week - this week. So actually, I think the safest time to buy a product is just after the recall - because they sure as hell aren't going to put out a tainted product when it's being advertised all over the media. Here's another hint though. Make sure you cook your ground beef thoroughly, and when reheating it or cooking those frozen premade meatballs, make sure it comes up to temperature. That means, it should be hot! Not kinda warm or a little tepid - hot. My problem is that I think of my stomach as indestructable. I imagine I have all kinds of good bacteria lurking around in there, from my childhood years. But hey, if you're not careful...watch out.

Getting back to the story at hand. Last night the FP made curried okra and ground beef over rice. With frozen okra. Shhhh! Don't tell Gordon Ramsey, he'll have a shit fit! He hates frozen food. I hear that he doesn't even serve ice cream - just liquid custard unchurned! But yeah, frozen okra. I had only really seen the frozen breaded stuff that you fry. But here in good old SoCal, there is not a bounty of okra as in Looziana. I've seen fresh okra at the asian markets - $4 for about a third a pound. So, no we don't use fresh okra here.

I told the FP that if I had never tasted the lamb version of this particular dish, how I would say the ground beef version would have blown me away. Unfortunately, I had tasted the lamb, and the ground beef was only extremely delicious to the 90th degree, rather than to the 100th degree. Anyway, here is the recipe. I'll try to relay it to you the way the FP would.

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curried okra And Ground lamb or Beef, Food pimp Style

onion- whatever, purple, white, yellow - oh, one or two of them. chop them up. Or you can slice them if you want

ground beef or lamb - you know, a pack of it

garlic - I don't know how much, however much you want. if you LikE it Garlicey than put alot. If not then just put a clove of two

diced tomato - a can of IT.

OKRA- a package of the frozen sliced Kind

one half jar of Spice Island curry power


So, saute the onion and garlic. Add in the ground beef, and brown it. Put in the curry powder now. Then add in teh tomatas,and the okra wtoo. When it's all cooked, it's done.



for the onion Relish:
fine diced onion
sliced SERRANOS - Not the HAm, although that might be good too
rice wine vinegar
new mexico chile powder
(oh, I don't know about the measurements, you know, whatever looks right. It's onion garnish, don't worry about how much)

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Sad sad Saigon

So, Sunday morning we went to Saigon. It was kinda late, oh, say almost 10 am. We usually go to eat vietnamese around 9 on weekends. Anyway, we were the first ones in there. They should have been opened at 9, but it felt stale and stuffy like they just unlocked the doors and walked in. We were the first customers of the day.

The FP ordered the combination pho, and I ordered the vermicelli noodles (bun) with shrimp paste on sugarcane. I ordered the number - I think it was 73 - and said the name in english and pointed to it. He repeated the number, the name in english, then he said the name in vietnamese, and he pointed to it. It took him a while to write it down. I don't know how new he was, but he definitely wasn't a rockstar waiter like all the guys who used to work there. They usually guessed what we wanted anyway. Although I change it up sometimes. But they were fast, nononsense, effective.

Anyway, the food came after what seemed like a while. My guess, they were still setting up the kitchen for service. So my shrimp was not on sugarcane. That was disappointing. That's the best part of shrimp on sugarcane. You get to suck all the flavor from the sugarcane! That's what my good good friend told me, Dr. Authority on Everything. He's very smart. He's a doctor in New Yark Citee! And his wife is a lawyah! I think I gave him a different name previously. I'll have to go check it sometime.

Anyway, I guess the Food Pimp's pho was okay. He ate half of it - but it was the big bowl. We didn't really talk much about the food. We were discussing the show that we were going to play in 11 or 12 hours at Backstage at the Bitter End. We wrote the setlist, discussed which songs had sucked (half of them) and which ones blew (half of the other half) at our previous gig on Friday at San Diego Sports Club. Not to be negative, but we were just ill prepared musically and mental, and yeah, I'll throw it in there, physically too. So anyway, if you're wondering, the show that night on Sunday was great! The people there are really nice, the sound there was awesome, we were ready, there was a good crowd. It's nights like that that make me realize how fucking fun it is to be in a good band! You can see our myspace page at http://www.myspace.com/theperfectblue/

So my food was pretty good. I felt like there was more stuff in it then usual. You know, the lettuce, carrots peanuts...at one point, there was basically no garnish in the vermicelli bowls. I didn't know if it was because they happened to run out of all the stuff coincidentally every time I got it, or that they were cutting back on costs or that the cook just didn't know how to make it properly. Or maybe all of the above. Anyway, it was a passable meal. By the time we left, there were still maybe 5-6 more tables than when we first walked in. Back in the heyday, when they were on there would have been about 15 tables in the place at that time...

It's sad to see a place in decline.

Monday, July 14, 2008

The keyword search of the day....

So, I check my statcounter quite often....

the prizewinning keyword search (on Google of course) which led someone to my little old blog:

"Is corned beef hash made out of cow vagina?"

Guess what? Try the search........





My blog comes up first!

So the runner up is:


"porkporn pussy"

Sorry guys (is it being too presumptive to think these are all guys who do the pork porn searches? Am I being a male chauvenist?) there isn't that kind of porn here. I admit, there is some...off color language...but no money shots in the sense that you guys or gals are thinking of money shots.......

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Sloppy Food Ho

So, Thursday night is typically american italian night. Not always, but if there were a regular theme to Thursday, that's what it is. I'm not sure why, it just kind of happened. I guess we just can't eat asian every single night because my repetoire for that and my resources and energy are usually severely limited.

So I was looking at the coconut and lime blog, http://coconutlime.blogspot.com/ and I saw sloppy joes. I was thinking american chop suey, but when I saw sloppy joes in one of the coconut & lime blog entries, I changed my mind. Sloppy Food Hos and blue cheese macaroni salad. I swear on my dead cat tiki's soul. He would have been going crazy if he were alive and me cooking ground beef. Well, Stinksy was very interested, just not quite the foodie that Tiki was....

Sloppy Food Hos

2 cloves garlic smashed
1/2 onion small diced
1.5# ground beef
1 t new mexico chile powder
2 t peri peri sauce (hot sauce)
1 T soy sauce
2 t salt
1 t Zatarian's creole seasoning
1/2 t cracked black pepper
1 oz rice vinegar
hot dog buns - you can use hamburger buns if you want, but I think the loose meat doesn't fall out quite as much in a hot dog bun. Of course you can use fancy bread too. I garnished with thin sliced sweet onion and blue cheese for the sloppy food ho in the picture, but I ate the second with just meat filling and hot dog bun - I thought it was better that way. It didn't need anything else, because the flavor is in the meat. So if your bread is soft, you might want to toast it. An important part it spooning some of the pan grease into your bun for the bread to soak it up. That is the really yummy extra that makes it deeeeeeeeeelicious.

So you know how to make this, right? I imagine that my readership is entirely made up of highly intelligent, very culinarily adept, could be mensa members.


Blue Cheese Macaroni Salad

6 c cooked macaroni
3 T dijon mustard
1/2 c mayo
2 oz blue cheese
1 T vinegar, optional if you like things very acidic - culinarily speaking
1 T hot sauce
1 fairly large carrot, shredded - not a porn-sized carrot, just a nice self pleasuring sized one
1 t Zatarain's creole seasoning
1 t salt
1/2 t cracked black pepper

Once again - you people are brilliant- no further explanation needed. So I ate this with the japanese cucumbers on the side. Yes, it's kind of uncool fusiony, but I swear these gingery pickles complemented the blue cheese macaroni really well.

The Food Pimp usually isn't a big fan of things like macaroni salad, but he loved this one - it was very pungent, vinegary, mustardy, blue cheesey. So if you don't like those flavors that much, use half as much of those ingredients.


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So don't make fun of this picture, I know it looks ugly, but it was really pretty good.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

mitsuwa dinner

So, Tuesday, I was in the neighborhood, so I went to Mitsuwa to pick up some stuff for dinner. I didn't feel like making a production, so I made one of our favorite comfort meals. Saba, edamame, mushrooms and rice.


Easy Peasy Mackerel & Edamame Dinenr

3/4# saba - that's mackerel to you laymen
1 pack frozen shelled edamame - that's edamame to you nonfoodies
1 pack bunshimeji mushrooms split by hand, not by knife - that's beech mushrooms to you food challenged ones, everyone knows what bunshimeji mushrooms are, right?
medium grain extra fancy rice- make sure ya'll get the extra fancy stuff
1 little nub of ginger, hand chopped or sliced thin, but not pureed or minced to death please
2 cloves garlic smashed, once again not pureed or squozen through one of those garlic presses
4 oz ponzu sauce, yes I bought a new bigger bottle of the stuff
1 oz sesame oil
salt

So for the edamame and mushrooms: Saute the ginger and garlic until you start to smell it cooking. Then throw in the mushrooms. Make sure its on high heat. Let the
mushrooms go a bit, then throw in the edamame. Toss them around the pan, saute for one minute, then add the ponzu and sesame oil and cover. Let steam for a few minutes.

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For the mackerel, dry the fillets as much as you can. Put some salt on it. Heat a really good saute or cast iron pan up really hot. Add some oil, let it coat the whole surface in a thin layer. This is important - let the oil get hot as well! If you put oil in and put the food in without heating the oil, it's gonna stick. So when it's all nice and hot, gently put one fillet in skin side down. Drag it through the oil around the pan. Do the same with the other. Let it go. Every once in a while after the first minute, you can shake it a bit to see make sure it doesn't stick, but it shouldn't if you followed all the preceeding steps. Now let it go on this one side until you see the edges on the top side starting to turn opaque - maybe 5 minutes. Then flip them, and shake them around a bit. Let them go maybe another 3 minutes. They should feell firm. Drain on paper towels and serve with the rice and edamame mushroom saute right away!

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Thursday, July 10, 2008

Dining for One

So, this past Saturday, I went to the practice space and I worked on this new song. I don't smoke or anything. So when I get started on a project, I don't really take a break when I'm alone unless I have to pee or poo. So I was there for about 3 and a half hours just working on these 3 guitar parts. (I'm not that great of a guitarist, obviously.) So all of a sudden, I felt faint. I realized that I hadn't really eaten much all day. I figured it was time to pack it up and get something to eat.

So, this was to be my last meal alone. I didn't feel like shopping and cooking, so I went to Phuong Trang. I felt like I should have gone somewhere new and exciting, but I was felt so bad that this was the easiest solution.

I went in, and I knew within 30 seconds what I wanted. This was probably a record. I got the Vermicelli noodle bowl with eggroll and pork.

They brought water. The guy who used to work at Saigon came by and asked, "you alone?" I said yeah. Then I sat there. I looked at the decorations on the walls. The flutes. I looked at the other diners. Mostly deuces (that's 2 tops or 2 people to a table to the layperson). Then this big family came in. They sat at the back table with the lazy susan. They were noisy. They were asian. Yet I guess not Vietnamese, maybe, because they were ordering in english. Pardon me, the dad was ordering in english. He took charge and ordered for the table, pretty loudly, because I could hear him across the room.

I don't think my food took that long, but it seemed like it did. I was very happy to see that bowl of noodley goodness, though.

I somehow remembered to take a picture. So I did.

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Then I took an eggroll segment and dipped it in the nuoc mam. It was hot (temperature) and sweet and vinegary. Just what I needed.

Then I got serious. I took the lettuce from the bottom of the bowl and the peanuts and carrot and jicama and mixed it all around. Then I dumped half the nuoc mam on it, some fish sauce and some siracha. Then I mixed some more. Then I took a bite of pork. God was it good! Really. I think even if I wasn't dying of starvation I would have been impressed. Because frankly, this marinated meat at vietnamese places can be hit or miss. I mean, I don't know how long they keep it, and it always looks all dry. Sometimes it blows, sometimes it the old don't judge a book by its cover kind of adage. I mean this looked dry. But it really wasn't. It retained the moisture inside. And the flavor was wonderful. Kind of gingery, with whatever spices they used, and the nuoc mam. It was very fortifying. I alternated eating pork and eggroll. Usually I eat the eggroll first so it won't get soggy. But in this case, I liked both so equally that I wanted that half and half experience throughout the whole ritual of eating the whole bowl. Which I did. I think I ate kind of fast.

Once again, just like in the practice space - when there's no one else to pace me, I just steam ahead full speed. Not only that, they must have refilled my water about 5 times. But I always consume a lot of water. I must have a drink at hand at all times. Now, those of you who know me probably think, oh is that a post katrina thing? It most certainly is not. I was like this before that bitch entered my life. Of course, it was like being in hell, not having enough water. I'm like that damned guy in greek mythology who couldn't drink water...you know. I used to know all this shit - back when I had way more brain cells.

Anyway, I ate it all. I went to the bathroom. Number 1 if you're interested. I swear. I wondered if they would think I was skipping out on the bill. They didn't, I don't think. I went up to pay. It was about $7.81. Weird. So cheap. I know, I was by myself and only ordered one thing. It was still weird. I don't think I've gone somewhere to eat by myself in a long time. The last time I can recall was when I went to the old Linkery and got the sausage picnic plate - but even then, I sat at the bar and had a beer or two, so it wasn't like dining there. It's not like I'm scerred to go eat alone - I just don't ever do it.

OMG Not Again!!!!!!!!!

So, I have to inform you of this. You will probably not believe this.

Okay, so those of you who "read" this blog know about the Food Pimp's digestive intolerance for cabbage? Well, you know how I made slaw for 4th of July? There was half a head of red or purple cabbage, if you will, in that bottom compartment in the fridge. He usually doesn't look in there. Well he did today. He cooked up almost all of that half a head, and guess what was going on when I got home from work? Yes, the big capital D. He must have gone 4 times before work, and it was those, oh, I have to go kind of moments. Yes he had to work, but it's not a foodborne illness kind of deal. Don't worry though, it's a wine class, anyway.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Why I didn't Post Last Month Pt2

So as I was writing in the last blog entry, I taught some cooking classes. So the second one was greek food.

Class 2 - Greek Festival Food

So this one was a bit north. I got there a little later than I would have liked, and I was not familiar with the recipes. The weird thing is, I'm not very good with recipes. I have to read them over and over, and I forget stuff.

So I organized all my groceries into 3 piles, for each of the three recipes. So there was a cookie, a spanakopita and a moussaka recipe. So the cookie dough is supposed to rest for an hour, so I thought I would start it first, then do the spanakopita, then the moussaka, then finish up with the cookie for dessert. So I chopped my veggies and all that. I wilted the spinach for the spanakopita and I fried the eggplant for the moussaka.

I think I was doing okay, but I'm not used to this concept of talking to strangers, so of course I was nervous. But it's this adrenaline rush/starbucks frappacino in the bottle kind of rush. I like that kind of rush. It's like, I feel like I'm going to go over the edge - I don't think I have yet...

So about 45 minutes before the class started, this one family came in. A mom and her two kids. The woman was in a wheelchair, and she had a speech disability like a stroke victim or whatever. So I was trying to prep and organize my thoughts and understand her and hold a conversation with her all at the same time. Now, I'm not a very coordinated person. I can't pat my head and rub my tummy at the same time, I can't drive and carry on a conversation, and I can do kitchen prep and talk - but I have had very bad cuts doing that. So I tried to act calm and hold a conversation.

So other women started coming in, and they were like, oh, I thought someone else was teaching class tonight, all disappointed. Now if I were not married to the FP and I was another actual real employee of the company, I'd be hurt and offended. I can't imagine how the other chefs feel when they hear that shit. So I waited until most of the people were there, then I spilled the beans. I'm the Food Pimp's wife. Okay, I didn't say food pimp, I used his real name. But anyway, they all went, oooh! You're his wife. He talks alot about you - all good. Then I go, yeah, that's nice. Then I introduce myself and say, he's the funny one, so I won't be cracking jokes like him, but maybe you'll learn something tonight.

So it went okay. I should have done more preprep. The thing with these gigs, is, you gotta know the equipment. If you're not familar with the equipment, you probably aren't going to be able to use it to your maximum advantage. Like, it was an electric range, so it took a while to brown my ground beef. And because I didn't prebrown it, it was very oily. And then, the FP had packed the bread crumbs for the moussaka in with his stuff, so there were no bread crumbs to sop up all that excess oil. I mean, I think it tasted okay, but it just didn't look too pretty. Especially because it was all women except for the one boy.

And then the other reason it took so long is because I used a lot of audience participation. I don't know if you've ever worked with phyllo before, but it's not the easiest thing. So I just had some people roll the spanakopita so that they could learn. Of course that is way more time consuming than if I had just knocked them all out. Back in the day I was a champion phyllo roller. We would do catering and have to make them, so you get good when you have all that practice.

Anyway, the cookies - which I was nervous about because the FP said to not to keep the oven hot when baking them - were the best thing. They are, like wedding cookies. I love those. Funny, we should have had those at our wedding because we both love them. So this class ended up taking about 1 hour and 45 minutes. Quite opposite of the night before, and about half the people were there.

So when I was cleaning up, a security guard walked in when I had my back turned, and he scared the shit out of me. He asked me if I was the cleaning lady. I said, no, there was a cooking class and I was just finishing up. So he asked if I had the keys, and I told him that they told me just to go out the side and the door would lock behind me. So I was grabbing my plastic bin and my mixer. He whips out a notebook and asks me for my name. And he asks what company I was with. Then he said, don't worry, I'm just writing it in my log. So then he left and then I left. I felt like I must have looked suspicious. Dirty little filipina girl taking a mixer that couldn't possibly be hers. I told the FP about it later, and he thought it was weird. The thing is, that he was black, and the dark chocolate likes my milk chocolate self....what the hey?

Anyway, the recipes to follow. These are not my recipes - they are the FP's recipes. Which is funny, because there are discrepancies which people noticed. But I was able to confesss that the FP wrote them and that I did not have time to proofread them. Then when I said they were his, everyone understood.


BIG CITY CHEFS


MOUSSAKA

3 large eggplants
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
Extra-virgin olive oil
1 medium onion, chopped
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 lemon, sliced in thin circles
1 handful oregano leaves, chopped
2 handfuls fresh flat-leaf parsley, chopped
2 pounds ground beef

8 ounces feta cheese, crumbled
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan
1 cup fresh bread crumbs

To prepare the eggplants: Cut off the stems, remove the skin with a vegetable peeler, and cut lengthwise into 1/2-inch thick slices. Season all the pieces of eggplant with salt and pepper on both sides. Coat a large skillet with oil and heat over medium flame. Fry the eggplant in a single layer, turning once, until brown on both sides- you will need to do this in batches, adding more oil, as necessary. Drain the eggplant as they cook on a paper towel-lined platter.
Add a little more oil to the pan and toss in the onion, garlic, lemon slices, oregano, and parsley. Cook and stir until soft and fragrant, about 3 minutes. Add the ground lamb, stirring to break up the meat; season with salt and pepper, and toss in the cinnamon stick. Stir in diced tomatoes. Simmer until the liquid has evaporated, stirring occasionally. Remove from the heat.
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Line the bottom of a 9 by 13-inch glass or ceramic baking dish with 1/3 of the eggplant slices; they should completely cover the bottom with no gaps. Spread 1/2 of the meat sauce over the eggplant, evening it out with a spatula. Sprinkle with 1/2 of the feta and Parmesan. Repeat the layers again, ending with a final layer of eggplant. Cover the top with a nice even layer of bread crumbs. Bake the moussaka for 30 to 40 minutes or until the top is golden. Let cool 10 minutes before serving.



BIG CITY CHEFS
SPANOKOPITA
3 tablespoons olive oil
1 onion, chopped
1/2 cup chopped green onions, white and green parts
3 garlic cloves, minced
2 pounds fresh baby spinach, trimmed, washed and roughly chopped
1/2 lemon, juiced
2 eggs, lightly beaten
12 ounces crumbled feta
1 tablespoon coriander seeds, toasted and ground
1/2 pound unsalted butter, melted
1 pound phyllo pastry sheets
1/4 cup finely chopped oregano

1/2 cup grated Parmesan
Heat olive oil in a large skillet and place over medium heat. Saute onions and garlic for 3 minutes until soft. Add the spinach, season with salt and pepper, and continue to saute until the spinach is limp, about 2 minutes. Add lemon juice, remove from heat and place in a colander, and squeeze out excess liquid. Set aside to cool. The filling needs to be cool and dry to prevent the phyllo from becoming soggy. In a medium bowl, beat the eggs with feta, coriander, and nutmeg. Season, then fold in the cooled spinach mixture until well blended.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F, brush 2 baking sheets with some melted butter. Unroll the phyllo dough and lay a sheet flat on a work surface. Take care to keep the phyllo covered with a damp, not wet, towel as you work to prevent drying out and becoming brittle. Brush the sheet with melted butter, then sprinkle evenly with some oregano. . Repeat with 2 more sheets of phyllo, stacking on top of each other. With a sharp knife or pizza cutter, cut the sheets lengthwise into thirds to form 2 1/2-inch strips. Do this with all the sheets of dough.
Place a heaping teaspoon of filling near 1 corner of the layered phyllo strip. Fold the end at an angle over the filling to form a triangle. Continue to fold the triangle along the strip until you reach the end, like folding up a flag. Brush the top with butter and dust with Parmesan, place on prepared baking sheet, and cover while preparing the remaining pastries. Repeat until all the filling and phyllo strips are used up. Bake for 20 to 30 minutes until the triangles are crisp and golden. Serve hot, warm or cold


BIG CITY CHEFS



KOURABIEDES

3/4 cup walnuts
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1/2 cup confectioners' sugar
1 large egg yolk
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
juice and zest of 1 orange
3/4 cup confectioners' sugar
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Toast the walnuts until golden brown and fragrant, about 6 minutes. Let cool, then chop about half of the nuts (you should have about 1/2 cup chopped). Pulse the remaining nuts in the food processor until finely ground (about 1/4 cup ground).
Stir the flour, baking powder, salt and nuts together in a medium bowl. Set aside.
In another medium bowl, beat the butter, sugar, egg yolk, juice and zest of the orange, and vanilla extract together with an electric mixer on medium-high speed until the mixture gets light and fluffy, about 10 minutes.
At low speed, stir in the nut mixture to make a crumbly dough. Cover the bowl and set dough aside at room temperature for 1 hour.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Line two baking sheets with parchment or coat with nonstick spray.
With a tablespoon, scoop out 1-inch pieces of dough and roll into balls between the palms of your hands. Pinch the ends of the balls to make a football shape. Place the cookies on the prepared baking sheets. Bake until the cookies set and start to brown, about 18 minutes.
Put the confectioners' sugar in a bag, and add 5 to 6 of the warm cookies to it. Very gently toss the cookies to coat with sugar. Remove them from the bag and cool cookies on a rack. Repeat with remaining cookies. Serve.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Why I didn't post much last month

So, I know I'm an excuse factory when it comes to not keep up with the blog. Here comes another excuse. The Food Pimp's job is with Big City Chefs - http://www.bigcitychefs.com/ . It's a national company that hires out chefs as independent contractors or personal chefs. They do catering and teach classes at apartment and condo communities and what not. So one of the local chefs was on vacation last month, so the boss asked if I could teach some of the extra classes.

Class 1 - Patriotic Picnic

Appropriately, this class was at one of the military housing communities here in SD. This is usually a large class and the residents tend to heckle the FP when he teaches there. It's all out of love, but it makes for a stressful job for him. I taught here once, and it was kind of a nightmare. The topic was indian cuisine with some fried bread and vindaloo, lots of ingredients and very time consuming stuff and it took the full 2 hours. So this time, I wanted to prepare ahead of time. Part of why it takes so long is because there will be between 20 - 25 people there sometimes. So the logistics of doing a demo and dishing it out adds on the minutes.

So how it works is that there are different topics that whomever schedules the class can pick from. It has a menu, but there is a disclaimer that sometimes the class will not have the exact menu due to availability of ingredients...etc.

So with this class, I used the menu. It was red, white & blue pasta salad, purple potato, fennel & red bell pepper salad, and tricolor trifle.

So I prepped a lot ahead of time. I cooked the pasta and potatoes and everything else I could do. Which was a good idea because the stove sucked. A lot of these places have fancy clean and new looking appliances that end of sucking. This was one of those electric stove tops with the element below so that its a flat surface. It looked like it was hot, but the water took an hour to boil, no lie.

The FP has his own teaching style - he really is more entertaining than educational. I would say that I'm more educational than entertaining. So, my intro that I developed is to ask how many people know the Food Pimp. Well, I actually use his real name. Only a few people seemed to know him. So I said anyway, I'm his wife, and I'm sorry I'm not as funny as him, but maybe you'll learn something from me. Or something like that. This class ended up having 23 people total, so it wasn't that great of a venue for cracking jokes anyway. I'm not really good with the mainstream humor, so I can't play to a big crowd of moms and kids. The ladies- the moms and the grandmas and the younger women, those are mainly the FP's target audience. The ladies love him. I'm not jealous..you can't be when you are married to a food pimp - it goes with the territory.

So I started by demoing the trifle, then to the kids' disappointment I put it in the cooler to chill. Then I did the purple potato salad, which was kind of weird because I sliced the red onion and fennel so that it was kind of chunkier than I prefer. Then I did the pasta, which I think was the best. After that I looked at the kids and I said, thanks you guys for coming, that's it. And they looked at me in puzzlement, then I said, oh, yeah, there's one more. Then I brought out the trifle. That was my one decent joke. The class took about 45 minutes. It was definitely a little too short, but it didn't involve much cooking. Here's the recipes:

Red, White and Blue Pasta Salad

1 lb cooked penne pasta or macaroni
4 chicken breasts, cooked and medium diced
1 bunch green onions, sliced
½ bunch parsley, chopped
1 pint cherry or grape tomatoes, halved
2 red bell peppers, diced
4 oz blue cheese crumbles
8 oz sour cream
2 oz mayo
½ T mustard
zest and juice of 1 lemon
3 oz extra virgin olive oil
salt and pepper



To make the dressing,mix the lemon juice and zest and mustard in a mixing bowl. Then add the bue cheese, sour cream and mayo. While whisking the mixture, add the olive oil. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Toss the chicken breasts in a portion of the dressing. Then gently mix all the rest of the ingredients in a big mixing bowl with the rest of the dressing. Add the chicken and toss until it is evenly distributed. Let chill for a few hours before serving.


Purple Potato and Fennel Salad

3 lbs purple potatoes
2 red bell peppers, roasted and peeled and julienned
2 bulbs fennel, shaved or thin sliced
1 red onion, sliced thin
fennel tops, chopped
½ bunch parsley, chopped
2 oz white wine vinegar
2 oz rice wine vinegar
1 t dijon mustard
2 cloves garlic, minced
6 oz olive oil
salt and pepper

If the potatoes are big, cut them in halves or quarters. Put them in a pot of cold water on the stove to boil. When the water comes to a boil, lower the heat to a simmer and cook until fork tender.

While potatoes are cooking, make the dressing. Mix the vinegar in a bowl with the Dijon. Add the garlic. While whisking the mixture, slowly drizzle in the olive oil. Add salt and pepper to taste.

When the potaoes are done, strain them, then place them in a big bowl with lots of room. Let them cool for about 5 minutes. Toss the dressing with the potatoes until they are all dressed. Then add the bell peppers, fennel, red onion, fennel tops and parsley. Gently toss it until it is all incorporated. Add salt and pepper as needed. Either serve the potato salad warm, or chill in the refrigerator 2 hours or more prior to serving.



Tricolor Trifle recipe

1 pound sponge or angel food cake
1/3 cup blueberry, strawberry or raspberry jam or pie filling
3 tablespoons cream sherry or sweet sherry
1 cup whipping cream
2 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
¼ cup cream and 1 pound marscapone cheese
½ c blueberries
½ c raspberries
½ c strawberries
Cut cake into even slices or layers about 1 inch thick. Spread with jam or pie filling. Cut into 1-inch cubes. Put into large mixing bowl. Sprinkle with sherry and toss lightly. Clean berries; reserve 1/2 cup clean berries for garnish.
Arrange cake cubes in individual serving bowls or champagne stem glasses. Add about 2 tablespoons pie filling over cake. Pour marscapone/cream mixture over cake and add about 1 tablespoon fresh berries. Cover and chill for at least 2 hours or overnight.
One hour before serving, whip cream until soft peaks form. Add sugar and vanilla extract. Garnish trifle with fresh berries. Top with whipped cream. After topping with cream, serve within a few hours as whipped cream will make the cake become soggy.
Makes 6 to 8 servings.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Slaw X 2

So, a few weeks ago, it was so ungodly hot that I didn't want to cook in the apartment. I wanted slaw for dinner, so that's what I made. I also cooked some shrimp, but they tasted yucky so we didn't really eat them. But we ate a half a head of cabbage worth of slaw for dinner. Then over the next couple of days the FP used the rest of the leftover ingredients to make more slaw and eat it for lunch. The only problem with him is that he...uh...doesn't...digest raw cabbage well. You know...he gets the runs. But he kept eating it because he loves cabbage - it's like a toxic relationship that he has with greens; cabbage, pea shoots, snow pea leaf, collard greens - leafy green veggies in general. I guess they're like a brillo pad for his system.

So anyway, yesterday was the birthday of our nation. The FP is out of town, but I went to our friends house, Mr. and Mrs. Matching Macs. So I made slaw. We also had chargrilled hotdogs and friendship rainbow potato salad. For dessert there was american flag jello.

So here are the two different versions of slaw. They are very similar, because I guess I have a kind of cooking style - it's called using up whatever is in the kitchen.

Asian Slaw I

1/2 head cabbage, sliced
4 carrots grated
1 red onion sliced thin (Ma cher, blox mare jaw now blah bra. Oh, that's Justin Wilson, the cajun cook. Don't worry about him. No one could ever understand what he was saying.)
handful of cilantro chopped
3 small avocadoes, sliced
1 cucumber, sliced
2 oz soy sauce (Where's the bam? Go back to your sound stage, Emeril. There's no bam here. Try the Food Pimp's cooking class. He might have a little bam in him.)
6 oz fish sauce
6 limes juiced
6 oz extra virgin olive oil (Oh, you mean evoo? No, get the fuck out of here Rachel Ray! Sorry folks, she's like a computer virus)


Okay, you don't need directions, do you? C'mon, it's slaw....


Asian Slaw II

1 head cabbage sliced
1/2 head red cabbage sliced
3 carrots grated (How do you grate it? In a food processor, with a box grater, what? Did you test different methods? No, Alton Brown, I didn't test it out. That's what your show is for...)
3 radishes thin sliced
1 red onion sliced
1 bunch cilantro rough chopped (Ooh yeah, I like it rough chopped. Okay Ainsley Harriot - I haven't heard anything from you for a while, stop trying to take over my blog. I crack the jokes around here!)
5 avocadoes sliced
2 inches ginger grated
6 limes juiced
2 oz ponzu sauce
3 oz soy sauce
2 oz fish sauce (Is that fresh fish sauce? Why are you using preserved stuff when you could be using fresh local fish sauce? Shut the fuck up, Gordon Ramsey, and get the fuck out! I'm shutting you down. You're doing my head in, you're a right wrinkly bastard.)
1/2 t salt
3 oz nuoc mam (Hmm...looks like asian fusion cooking here. Very insightful, Ming Tsai. As long as it tastes good let's not worry about what kind of style it is.)
1 oz apple cider vinegar
2 oz some kind of "organic" honey that my boss gave me. It's thick and dark gold and ... well, it's sweet
handful of sesame seeds
1/2 second squirt of siracha, otherwise known as rooster sauce

So mix the shit up and eat it!

I thought I took more pictures than I did yesterday. Here are the few ones I took.

What we ate:
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The Attentionho holding her american flag jello that you can't see:
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Mr. Hot Redneck from MI contemplating his weiner:
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Marin not wanting me to take this cute picture:
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Mr.Hot Redneck from MI and the AttentionHo looking crabby:
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Thursday, July 3, 2008

Can't get enough HOOTERS!

Yeah, Hooters - the sports bar/restaurant/80s pop culture icon. Yes, we are chef and cook and yes we love Hooters. No, I'm not a lesbian. Why does everyone always assume that? Just because I believe I was supposed to be born a boy doesn't mean I'm gay. (Not that its a bad thing - I have a few gay friends and acquaintences on my very diverse list of friends and acquaintences)

Anyway, Yeah, we went to Hooters twice in a month. So the first time was Father's Day. We were driving back from LA. The FP did a brunch gig in Manhattan Beach. Very lovely area. So on the way back, he mentioned Hooters, and I said, yeah that would be okay. So that was the trigger. I don't know if you've ever noticed, but there are a lot of orange clay roofs in Orange County. And Hooters happens to be orange also. So every orange thing on the interstate caught the FP's eye because he was trolling for Hooters. I was afraid he was going to get into a car crash looking for the damn place. Alas, I think we had already passed the OC Hooters when we thought of eating there. So he had to wait till we got to Mission Valley to eat. And I swear, we got there in record time.

So we got there around 2 or 3, and there weren't many people there. Out of the whole restaurant, it looked like 1/3 of the clientele were fathers and families celebrating father's day. That was nice to see. Take horny old dad out to his fave joint so he can talk to a bunch of girls in tight orange shorts and scrunchy socks.

So we ordered. I got 10 three mile island wings - extra wet. The FP got 20 I think, but his were 911. There was a bit of confusion when he ordered. He asked for extra wing sauce on the side. So I said do you want extra sauce and extra wet? And at the same time the Hootergirl asked if he wanted wing sauce instead of a blue cheese sauce. He didn't really know what was going on, so he just said yes. So I had to translate - vagina to vagina. So we got extra blue cheese sauce and veggies, and his wing sauce on the side, and we ordered curly fries too. And I'm sure we had beers too. So the food came pretty fast, and two other Hooter girls delivered the goods.

I don't remember any of their names - I should have taken the paper towel that they wrote their names on. You know what I'm talking about? C'mon. You've never been to Hooters? Liar! Oh, just for take out? Right. You don't go to look at the girls, you go for the food? Actually, that's how we are. Anyway, that's what the Food Pimp says. Well, he actually says he doesn't look at the girls because it seems wrong. Like they are underage or something. In fact, our Hooter girl had some serious junk in the trunk. I mean, she was some white girl with blond hair, and she had this 3D ass out of nowhere. It was very unexpectedly shocking. But I couldn't get the FP to look at her butt. I guess it's embarrassing when your wife's trying to get you to look at some younger girl's ass.

Getting back to the food. Our fries never came. But our blue cheese sauce and veggies were all the sides we needed. I was quite satiated with my extra wet wings, as the FP was satiated with his wet wings and extra sauce to slather on at will. Mine were not quite hot enough, but almost. But they were perfectly saucy, yet still crispy. The weird thing about this Mission Valley Hooters is, the sauce just is not as hot as it should be. I mean, hot should be hot. That's what I usually get at other Hooters. But Three Mile Island is hot. And I think 911 is more like Three Mile Island level. But anyway, we gobbled them wings up, boy. They were DDeeeeelicious with a capital double D. Or maybe just a nice perky C cup.

And then we were in for a real treat. Lunchtime entertainment. It seems there were a few birthdays. There was a 14 year old boy, a 14 year old girl, a 21 year old boy, and like a 3 or 4 year old. So they "spanked" them with a paddle - how many times depended on how old they were. After the obligatory spanks, some of the other girls slapped them on the butt as well. Except for the little kid. They didn't spank him. Then they made all the boys stand in the middle of a circle surrounded by Hooter girls. The birthday girl stood outside with the Hooters girls (future applicant?) They did the hokey pokey, except they changed the lyrics - you put your left wing in... you put your scrunchy sock in... you put your name tag in (why not, you put your left Hooter in?)...you put your orange shorts in. It was so much entertainment!

Anyway, we went back home and vegged in front of the TV for the rest of the afternoon/evening/night.

So then last weekend we went to Hooter's again. It was after the EuroCup Final. So again, we were there about the same time on a Sunday. I think we ordered the same thing with less confusion. Our server was on her break, so some other girl took our order for her. I asked this girl if she was from New Orleans and she said she had family there that she had visited. When she walked away, the FP asked how I knew. I said it was on her shirt. Maybe he really doesn't look at these chicks.

Anyway, our food came out pretty fast. And we got curly fries this time. It was hotter! Like I think mine fit the description of Three mile island and his were 911. My dehydrated chapped lips felt the burn, in a good masochistic way! So the FP pretty much devoured his. I got a box for my leftovers and he asked why. He said we wouldn't eat those. I took them anyway. The next day, I saw the empty Hooters box in the trash can.....

I give this Hooters......\/\/\/\ seven chompsticks. I can't give 8 because usually the sauce doesn't quite live up to its description. But the way the wings are fried are pretty damn close to perfection!